Blue, blue skies

I'd do anything for eternally blue skies. For days of full of happiness, free from the dragging chains of self-doubt, insecurities, set backs, disillusionment. For days where I feel full... of life, love and satisfaction. For days where I feel like the world isn't trying to eat me alive, and that there's someone on my side. For days where people make me feel like I'm enough, just by being me. Like I'm a solid entity in this world. Like I would be missed if I were to disappear.

Eve Ensler said that to fix the broken parts inside of yourself you must give to the world what you want most. I don't know if you could say the world is inherently broken, but I think its seriously lacking in kindness sometimes. There are too many people out there who feel alone and empty. Too many people who've written themselves off, or become complacent. Too many people who feel like they must brace themselves against the sharp edges of the world.

The world is round... it shouldn't have sharp corners. If what went around and came around was a little bit more loveliness, I personally think the world would be a softer (and ironically stronger) circle. So armed with Noah and the Whale, a little bit more insight into the darker moments than I would like, a belief that the world is inherently good, a refusal to play games, and a lot of heart... This is my contribution to the world.

Because I've been there. Because more often than not, I want to tie myself to a million balloons and float away. Because I'm still learning... to live. Because noone should ever feel alone, or ashamed of who they are. Because society is fucked in many aspects where it is vitally important that it be unfucked. Because I can.

Because you don't need to feel alone, unloved, or undeserving; because you're not.

Because its all going to be okay, if we can just hold on together. :-)

The purpose of this blog is to focus on the blue skies. To look up, hold our heads high, and find something beautiful overhead. Cause blue skies are calling, but I know that its hard.

This is a documentation of one 21 year old girl's meander through a small part of the world; Wellington, New Zealand, to be exact. With as much grace and courage as she possesses; trying to survive, learn, and help.

I don't know if there's anyone out there who needs this, but just in case, I'm going to be here for you. It might be reassuring to know that even though on the outside a girl can have wonderful friends, a myriad of opportunities, a ready smile, and the ability to converse (reasonably successfully) with others in social situations, she's really just a little bit lost and uncertain, reasonably weird, and a lot scared. But she's still trying. And if nothing else, I'm sure this blog will bring comic relief at the absurdity of my thought processes!

I'd do anything to make us happy :-)


Song: "Blue Skies," by Noah and the Whale